Thursday, July 21, 2011

An evening of ice cream and good times, told by Brett

(A post from the papa-to-be)

Last night we went to our Centering Group at the Midwifery Center. It had been two weeks since our last meeting, and one of the couples in the group has already given birth! We really like the group there, and this meeting was nice as usual. The midwife there is excellent at answering questions honestly and completely, and both she and the facilitator are really good at letting the group answer questions from their experiences and knowledge, too. We feel like this is a big difference from the approach of the doctors at other practices, and even from the one-on-one meetings at the Midwife Center.

After the meeting was over, the three couples with twins all went out for ice cream together. What fun! When we go out alone now, it's rare that we don't get comments like, "Boy, you must be ready to pop!" but it was really fun to see people react to the three very large bellies all together! One woman asked if she could photograph them, and another one interrupted us to ask why "everyone these days gets C-sections."

Three different large bellies arrive for ice cream.

Jenny, Benita, and Kelly turn to face the amazed public for a picture.

The best part of all this was that we got to sit down together, three couples going through a really similar experience, with due dates all within five days, and just talk about stuff. The women asked each other about specific parts of the pregnancy experience (rolling over vs. getting up to lie down on the other hip, how much do the twins inside move?) and we all talked about the mental struggles associated with birth not going quite the way we want, and also some of the exciting things to come. Sharing the evening with two other couples that were relaxed and fun to chat with was so nice and very affirming to me, and to Jenny as well, I think.

Sometimes people ask me if I'm emotionally prepared for fatherhood. They ask in a nice and supportive way, but the truth is that I am, and I haven't really even thought or worried too much about it. The first month or two, maybe, I had to take a few deep breaths, but I'm ready to try being a parent, a father. I don't think that most pregnant women are really any more ready than I am: no one can be "fully prepared" for what is about to happen us.

Speaking of preparations, we're doing pretty well. For me, getting the new car, with four doors instead of two, was a big hurdle that we're now past. We still need a few more diapers and things, but now for me the biggest stuff left is to make sure we have a good support network set up for when it's time. I already have people on call for my Pedal People work, so that's good; I'm so thankful for how flexible the Pedal People work system is! My next project is to send out an email with a link to our account on CareCalendar.org, to people nearby who have offered to help, so they can sign up to help when the time comes. I think most of the help we'll be looking for will be meals. We love to cook, but we think we'll mostly want to focus on our two darling baby girls!

When it comes down to it, we feel both very prepared and pretty much clueless as to how it's going to be, but we're pretty much okay with all that. Last summer we took a big adventure, and I'm looking at this the same way, although this one won't ever really end!

4 comments:

  1. Wow, those pictures are amazing!! I think you guys are really lucky to have two other couples in the area to experience this with!
    Keep us posted on the CareCalendar.org! <3

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  2. What a cool gathering! I want to be in line next year when there are 6 kids all the same age getting their ice cream.
    Nice to hear from the Papa. I'm so proud of you both.
    Love and hugs,
    Mom

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  3. Y'all are indeed embarking on the ultimate adventure. :)I wish I lived closer. I miss Noho and I would love to be able to cook for you guys and help with the behbies.

    I am restless tonight. I feel like something is going on with one of my friends (I'm sure you remember my tendency to get that) and so I popped on here to make sure Jenny wasn't delivering yet. :p

    :) Be well.
    -Ann

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  4. I take it that the other two mamas-to-be are also pregnant with twins, by an earlier comment. That is amazing -- six children among the three of them!

    When I was pregnant with our older son, David kept saying during the pregnancy that it was like having a visitor arriving who was going to stay for twenty years, yet we hadn't yet met this "visitor." This times two for you!

    The very best to you and the two soon-to-be arrivals!

    Saloma

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